[ Maskless, Peter keeps a keen eye on the rest of the city from his rooftop perch. And then he spends the next few minutes pacing without purpose, the rest of his costume feeling like a traitorous second skin, like it betrayed him even if that isn't - it can't the case. His heart is beating a million miles per minute and he isn't sure whether he should be calling Ned up or calling his aunt, or avoiding them, or - no, no, no. Gwen will have answers. Gwen will know what to do.
So the moment he hears the familiar thiwp of webbing and her feet touch the roofing, he feels the heavy weight in his chest lift a little. It's enough for now.
He's quick to wrap his arms around her too, burying his face into the crook of her neck. ]
Nnh-hn, no. It's going to be okay. Jameson is a psychopath, and so was Beck. And the world's gonna know that soon enough. [ she tucks her face against the side of his head, and it's around now that she notices her heart is still pounding in her chest and it has nothing to do with the full-tilt sprint she took to get here. it's okay, though. he's right here, and he's okay, and it's okay. ]
People love Spider-Man. It's going to take more than some- crazy edited sound bite of him saying something so insanely out of character for him to get the world to actually believe you're not good. And people- people love Peter Parker, too. You know that. We're going to keep you safe, and May, until we figure this out.
[ For a moment, all Peter can do is nod a little, his face still buried away, like he isn't sure he can quite face Gwen just yet. Like, maybe, somehow, this was his fault and he had it coming. Those were, after all, his words. Beck had somehow managed to capture him saying the wrong thing, and he shouldn't have said it like that. He should've been more careful. He should have known. ]
I've thought about it, you know. Like, once or twice. Telling everyone who I was. [ It's a muffled confession, likely only half-articulated until he forces himself to pull back just enough to look at Gwen. ] But it was always supposed to be my choice. This feels like -
[ It feels awful. It feels like the choice was not only someone else's, but it was stolen from him. The fact that it was Beck, and he'd somehow managed to trick him again? Well, it's also more than a little humiliating. ]
Yeah, I know. I know. It should have been you, not him.
[ it's wild, right, because gwen came clean to the bugle, then the chief of police, but it was all when she was very much under the influence of venom and she thinks about that more often than she should. was it really what she wanted? but it's easier to own it now, so long after the fact. still, Peter's looking at her and her heart kind of aches even as her symbiote thrums under the surface, angry and vengeful. but Beck is dead now, supposedly, so there's nowhere for that anger to go.
so instead she just looks a little sad, a lot concerned. she takes a tiny step back but she doesn't break off the contact, her hands moving to his shoulders before the slide down his arms. and it makes her heart kind of hiccup to take his gloved hands in hers, but it feels right to. ]
What? Of course they do. ... Well, okay, not everyone. But Spider-Man helps kids find their stolen bikes, and webs up guys trying to rob hardworking people, and helps raise money for- libraries and homeless shelters and stuff. That doesn't just go away because of this. I'm proof of that. Right? Venom- I did some really messed up stuff. But the truth of things always come to the surface eventually. We just- keep doing what we do. We keep fighting.
[ she bites her lip, stopping the babbling for just a moment. she knows she's preaching, and she's trying not to, but- yeah. her voice is a little quieter when she starts again ]
And you know I've got your back, yeah? Always. [ a beat ] And I'll drag the rest of the Avengers here from wherever the hell they are myself to defend Spider-Man, too. You know they will.
Yeah. You're right. [ The good things he does, that's gotta count for something. He can only hope that in this awful, terrifying time of Peter Parker's life, that it'll somehow work out in the end.
Even though he's feeling more exposed than he ever had before.
All those times back in school, before The Blip, when he made up dumb excuses to save the world. The Stark Internship. Falling 'ill'. Everyone will know.
He squeezes Gwen's hand, so, so grateful for her right now. He might still be high-key panicking, but her being here helps so much. ] Thanks, Gwen.
I don't even know where the other Avengers are right now - [ He could really use some of that snappy, sassy Tony Stark advice right about now, and the empty hole left from his mentor suddenly stirs up again, a dull pain in his chest. ] - but I bet they'll see this too. [ He stops suddenly. ] And Nick Fury.
He's definitely going to call, and you definitely need to answer it this time. And it's not going to be a fun conversation at all, but this mess isn't your fault. Like, he's probably going to be a jerk about all of it, but he'll help you. That man is the king of damage control.
[ she takes another breath, mouth twisting up. she's nervous because- of course she's nervous. of course she is! this is not the way anything like this should go. god, she wishes jess were here. she'd be way better at this than she is. she'd know exactly what to say, what to do next. all gwen can think to say is- ]
We should sit. C'mon. [ there's a little ledge closer to the middle of the roof, which is where she's pulling him to now. there've been a few times when they'e ended up in this exact same spot, out of breath, adrenaline pumping. needing a breather after a particularly ridiculous run-in with some armed robbers or whatever. it's just big enough for the both of them to sit side by side, and she pulls his hand onto her lap, unwilling to let go just yet ] --Have you talked to May yet?
[ Peter shakes his head. ] No, all I had time to do was ... panic and websling here, until you texted me. It just - it all happened so fast. She's gonna be worried though. She's gonna wonder where I am.
[ He rubs his face with his free hand, the one not still in Gwen's grasp where it's perfectly content to stay, an automatic feeling of safety and feeling anchored to something. His mind is reeling, but at least he isn't alone with his own thoughts.
He leans into Gwen so their arms are pressed side-by-side. ] I should probably call her. And Happy. He probably knows too. But after that? What happens? What happens to Spider-Man?
[ This is kind of a nightmare. At the beginning, when Ned learned who he was, he'd wanted to tell everyone like it was some kind of key, opening the door to celebrity status and being revered by all. A superhero, like the Avengers.
But so much has changed since then, so much had happened ... it feels right, somehow, to have this other side of him kept secret, something he can escape to and escape from whenever he wants.
It kinda sucks to have that taken away from him. ]
Text her, at least. Just say- "I'm okay, will explain, talk soon", so she doesn't think you're MIA. Then call her when you're ready to. Happy can wait.
[ she's not usually this friend, the kind of bossy-advice-giver-friend, but she knows what it's like to have the rug ripped out from under you in a situation like this, how hard it is to get your thoughts in order, so she's trying to give him objectives. something.
peter leans against her and gwen leans back, turning her face to rest on his shoulder as her fingers fuss to lace up properly with his. normally she'd be overthinking this kind of closeness, but there's no room for that now, too much worry about bigger things than seeming too clingy ]
Spider-Man is going to be okay. Do you think- Are you going to lean into it? Y'know, unmask? Or- Or you could try and protect your secret identity. Maybe you could find a way to get your side out there, as Spider-Man. Let the world know Beck was deranged and throwing out names he heard- Maybe around Stark Industries. He knows Peter Parker as Tony Stark's last intern. You could use that?
Maybe. [ He isn't exactly sure what he's answering here, whether he'll lean into the unmasking, or whether he'll make something up, the way he's always made something up. It seems more dangerous, somehow, to lie - especially when all eyes, especially The Bugle's, will be on him - but ... unmasking and coming clean about it just seems so ... scary.
He looks down at their joined hands but it doesn't occur to him to be weird about the gesture either. Time and a place, it seems. Also, it's just nice to be like this. ]
Hey, Gwen ... when you did it, when you unmasked, how - how did it go? How'd you figure it out? How'd you move forward after that?
[ remember how I said I studied abroad for a full school year while you were blipped? I was actually locked up in the RAFT.
no, maybe not that. we're not going to tell peter about her time in juvenile max security prison, not just yet. not now. because- this is different! gwen confessed to her crimes, because there were actual crimes to confess. venom- really did a number on, uh, her whole life. but she had a lot she had to come to peace with, and make amends for, so
anyway, we're going to focus on the time after that. ]
I kind of knew it was going to be a mess. Just- the timing of it could have been better. But I got sick of hiding, I guess. But, um. There's people who support me, and people who don't. Weirdly enough, school is the toughest part. People either know somebody I helped put in jail, which is- not a great time, or they're trying to take selfies of me over their shoulder which is just weird. But life hasn't really changed otherwise. It's kind of nice, though, not being at the mercy of how fast I can pull my suit on when I need to do Spider-Woman stuff. And I don't have to make excuses for running out anymore. It has its perks.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
So the moment he hears the familiar thiwp of webbing and her feet touch the roofing, he feels the heavy weight in his chest lift a little. It's enough for now.
He's quick to wrap his arms around her too, burying his face into the crook of her neck. ]
I'm so screwed, Gwen.
no subject
People love Spider-Man. It's going to take more than some- crazy edited sound bite of him saying something so insanely out of character for him to get the world to actually believe you're not good. And people- people love Peter Parker, too. You know that. We're going to keep you safe, and May, until we figure this out.
no subject
I've thought about it, you know. Like, once or twice. Telling everyone who I was. [ It's a muffled confession, likely only half-articulated until he forces himself to pull back just enough to look at Gwen. ] But it was always supposed to be my choice. This feels like -
[ It feels awful. It feels like the choice was not only someone else's, but it was stolen from him. The fact that it was Beck, and he'd somehow managed to trick him again? Well, it's also more than a little humiliating. ]
And not everyone loves Spider-Man.
no subject
[ it's wild, right, because gwen came clean to the bugle, then the chief of police, but it was all when she was very much under the influence of venom and she thinks about that more often than she should. was it really what she wanted? but it's easier to own it now, so long after the fact. still, Peter's looking at her and her heart kind of aches even as her symbiote thrums under the surface, angry and vengeful. but Beck is dead now, supposedly, so there's nowhere for that anger to go.
so instead she just looks a little sad, a lot concerned. she takes a tiny step back but she doesn't break off the contact, her hands moving to his shoulders before the slide down his arms. and it makes her heart kind of hiccup to take his gloved hands in hers, but it feels right to. ]
What? Of course they do. ... Well, okay, not everyone. But Spider-Man helps kids find their stolen bikes, and webs up guys trying to rob hardworking people, and helps raise money for- libraries and homeless shelters and stuff. That doesn't just go away because of this. I'm proof of that. Right? Venom- I did some really messed up stuff. But the truth of things always come to the surface eventually. We just- keep doing what we do. We keep fighting.
[ she bites her lip, stopping the babbling for just a moment. she knows she's preaching, and she's trying not to, but- yeah. her voice is a little quieter when she starts again ]
And you know I've got your back, yeah? Always. [ a beat ] And I'll drag the rest of the Avengers here from wherever the hell they are myself to defend Spider-Man, too. You know they will.
no subject
Even though he's feeling more exposed than he ever had before.
All those times back in school, before The Blip, when he made up dumb excuses to save the world. The Stark Internship. Falling 'ill'. Everyone will know.
He squeezes Gwen's hand, so, so grateful for her right now. He might still be high-key panicking, but her being here helps so much. ] Thanks, Gwen.
I don't even know where the other Avengers are right now - [ He could really use some of that snappy, sassy Tony Stark advice right about now, and the empty hole left from his mentor suddenly stirs up again, a dull pain in his chest. ] - but I bet they'll see this too. [ He stops suddenly. ] And Nick Fury.
[ He groans. ]
He's gonna call me soon, isn't he?
no subject
[ she takes another breath, mouth twisting up. she's nervous because- of course she's nervous. of course she is! this is not the way anything like this should go. god, she wishes jess were here. she'd be way better at this than she is. she'd know exactly what to say, what to do next. all gwen can think to say is- ]
We should sit. C'mon. [ there's a little ledge closer to the middle of the roof, which is where she's pulling him to now. there've been a few times when they'e ended up in this exact same spot, out of breath, adrenaline pumping. needing a breather after a particularly ridiculous run-in with some armed robbers or whatever. it's just big enough for the both of them to sit side by side, and she pulls his hand onto her lap, unwilling to let go just yet ] --Have you talked to May yet?
no subject
[ He rubs his face with his free hand, the one not still in Gwen's grasp where it's perfectly content to stay, an automatic feeling of safety and feeling anchored to something. His mind is reeling, but at least he isn't alone with his own thoughts.
He leans into Gwen so their arms are pressed side-by-side. ] I should probably call her. And Happy. He probably knows too. But after that? What happens? What happens to Spider-Man?
[ This is kind of a nightmare. At the beginning, when Ned learned who he was, he'd wanted to tell everyone like it was some kind of key, opening the door to celebrity status and being revered by all. A superhero, like the Avengers.
But so much has changed since then, so much had happened ... it feels right, somehow, to have this other side of him kept secret, something he can escape to and escape from whenever he wants.
It kinda sucks to have that taken away from him. ]
no subject
[ she's not usually this friend, the kind of bossy-advice-giver-friend, but she knows what it's like to have the rug ripped out from under you in a situation like this, how hard it is to get your thoughts in order, so she's trying to give him objectives. something.
peter leans against her and gwen leans back, turning her face to rest on his shoulder as her fingers fuss to lace up properly with his. normally she'd be overthinking this kind of closeness, but there's no room for that now, too much worry about bigger things than seeming too clingy ]
Spider-Man is going to be okay. Do you think- Are you going to lean into it? Y'know, unmask? Or- Or you could try and protect your secret identity. Maybe you could find a way to get your side out there, as Spider-Man. Let the world know Beck was deranged and throwing out names he heard- Maybe around Stark Industries. He knows Peter Parker as Tony Stark's last intern. You could use that?
no subject
He looks down at their joined hands but it doesn't occur to him to be weird about the gesture either. Time and a place, it seems. Also, it's just nice to be like this. ]
Hey, Gwen ... when you did it, when you unmasked, how - how did it go? How'd you figure it out? How'd you move forward after that?
no subject
[ remember how I said I studied abroad for a full school year while you were blipped? I was actually locked up in the RAFT.
no, maybe not that. we're not going to tell peter about her time in juvenile max security prison, not just yet. not now. because- this is different! gwen confessed to her crimes, because there were actual crimes to confess. venom- really did a number on, uh, her whole life. but she had a lot she had to come to peace with, and make amends for, so
anyway, we're going to focus on the time after that. ]
I kind of knew it was going to be a mess. Just- the timing of it could have been better. But I got sick of hiding, I guess. But, um. There's people who support me, and people who don't. Weirdly enough, school is the toughest part. People either know somebody I helped put in jail, which is- not a great time, or they're trying to take selfies of me over their shoulder which is just weird. But life hasn't really changed otherwise. It's kind of nice, though, not being at the mercy of how fast I can pull my suit on when I need to do Spider-Woman stuff. And I don't have to make excuses for running out anymore. It has its perks.